It is hard for me not to believe in "chemistry". I had been completely "overwhelmed" by it! Yes, it would be risky if we totally depended on "chemistry" to decide our destiny. But the thrill was in risk taking, especially when ones heart was young and adventurous.
It is suffice to say that the two days spent with him had been eternally edged into my memory. Recalling the details seems tedious, yet reminiscing brought a kind of sweetness that could only be felt with my heart and tasted with my spirit.
Said simply, I fell in love.
Was I blindly in love? I had every reason to believe otherwise. There were evidences of good characters and uprightness that impressed me. I had basis for comparisons for there had been others before him.
I was not left without struggle. The reasoning, the pondering and the searching that went on in my young mind caused me to toss in sleeplessness. I wondered if the feelings were mutual.
I penned them down in a letter and sent it.
As it turned out, no one will ever know the content of it. The letter mysteriously never arrived at its intended recipient. But imagine my elation when I received the following letter instead.
Read the letter
Dear ...,
Days past quickly and its almost a week since I was in Singapore...
...My stay in Singapore was most enjoyable and regretfully too short. Not that there wasn't enough time to fulfil the things I had planned to do but when I had such a pleasant time with you, there never seems to be enough time. I guess I'm getiing to the point rather quickly. I hope you appreciate the difficulty I'm facing trying to express to you how I feel, not knowing how you feel and being unsure of myself. What I really desire is to know you more intimately to see what can develop between the 'real' you and the'real' I...
...I'm seeking for eternal happiness, not a dream or a fairytale though fairytale characters always end up living happily ever after...I've lived and experienced the gospel to the degree that there is no longer room in my mind to doubt its truthfulness. My daily goal is to overcome all things and endure to the end and I guess that's the part that's difficult to do alone.
Should your desires be compatible to mine, you can see my very first proposal to you is in itself a challenge. Not only is there the distance which makes intimacy rather difficult but can we see through what is mere infatuation, physical attraction and impulse to experience genuine and everlasting love...? Anyway, the distance that separates us may not be a bad thing for it is a good test of the depth of our relationship. Time is the other.
A challenge, indeed it was.
The ride has been interesting and never without hitches or surprises.
Yet, it had all been worthwhile.
1 comment:
Oooooooo.... I can still feel those words today!!
The mind may be a little more complexed today but the spirit is still the same! Thanks for sharing a short span of 23 years together todate, short as compared to what we look forward to ie. an everlasting life together.
Remember the bookmark that read, "Love is not looking at each other but looking in the same direction." He He... can you find that book mark????
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